heath & wellness, self

Face that fear! 

When was the last time you did something you were afraid of? I took the plunge yesterday and conquered a bit of a fear I’ve had for a long time – I took myself out for breakfast. 

Phew. It’s really not hard to write but the idea of dining alone has forever scared the crap out of me. 

Strange girl! 

I’m perfectly okay hanging out by myself. But only at home. If I’m ever the first to arrive at an event I tend to wait in my car and scroll on my phone til whoever I’m meeting arrives. If I ever head out to a party where I don’t know many people, I freak. Cue the “rescue remedy” and 200 cups of peppermint tea for my nerves. I recently attended a work friends housewarming (Mexican themed of course). I obviously knew the host, but walking into the noisy mix of people having a great time I felt anxious and nervy and blah, like the new kid at school. Thankfully my friend had a great bunch of mates and I relaxed after a few drinks but it felt awful to not know anyone and have to rely on myself in the initial moments. You’ll be pleased to know I had a really fab time and met a handful of really cool people (and I didn’t even have to get really drunk to do so)!

But general panic/social awkwardness as of late is the reason I took myself out on a date. Back in my uni days I worked in hospitality and I always remember the customers who would dine alone. I felt sorry for them, and couldn’t believe they could go out by themselves and still have a good time! Being young and silly I didn’t think about why they could have been out alone, just pitied them. I’m really not that girl anymore, and these days I envy those kinds of people. The go-getters. The ones who just roll with it. I want that. I want to be able to walk into a room and not worry about what the silly waitress in the corner thinks. I’m facing my fears!

  

I chose a local cafe close to home that I frequent with E and my friends. Sprolo is a specialty coffee spot with fantastic food and friendly staff and I knew I’d feel comfortable alone in a place where I’d been before. I already knew what I wanted so I ordered pretty much as soon as I walked in the door, and chose a table by the window so I could people watch (and photograph my food of course) comfortably. I’ll admit I did feel a bit panicky so E may have received a few text messages about being out BY MYSELF and of course she was encouraging and calming as usual. You’ll be pleased to know I made random chit chat with the waiter who brought me my brunch, and I even made a silly joke. Feeling calmer by the second. On leaving I managed a genuine smile and thanks, and walked out feeling, well… liberated! I may not be comfortable heading out alone on a regular basis cos I did miss having someone to chat with, but I feel like this is a big step for my anxious self. Self high five! As scary as it was, I’ve realised sometimes you just have to take the plunge and face your fears. If it’ll help me in the future, why the hell not!

What are you afraid of? How do you face your fears?

E x 

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16 Comments

  1. My only “selfie date” was when I went to the movies by myself in Sydney while I was killing time before flying home. You really take for granted having someone there to chat with before the movie starts, and you feel like everyone is looking at you thinking “who is that loner!?” when in reality, no one cares haha 🙂 Good work on getting over your fears!

    • Exactly L, no one cares cos we forget they all have their own stuff going on. Perhaps they secretly envy our “confidence” haha x

  2. With all my friends on the East coast, I’m more at home with eating out on my own than I probably should be. I’m facing a few fears next week. Hopefully I will live to blog about them. 😉

    • You will def live to blog about them! Nothing wrong with being at home about hanging out by yourself, it’s a gift hun! x

  3. I’m okay being by myself like in a cafe, movies or whatever but not by myself in a group. I could never turn up to a party or event on my own. Which is why the thing I have recently done to face my fears is booked a ticket for the Little Blog Big Workshop here in Adelaide in June and I am bricking it. BRICKING IT.

    • GAH good on you! Being alone at those kind of things freak me too’! At the kidspot events last year I was so effing nervous I walked in and nearly fainted haha but you just have to go with it! can’t wait to hear about the blog course xx

  4. I’m boarding a plane for a holiday to Europe on Thursday, excited but nervous – hugely out of my comfort zone!

    • Go you! That’s huge. Holidays are best and flying although scary, is very relaxing to shut off and relax! Have a wonderful trip x

  5. The part about walking into a party on your own – that’s me to a tee. I don’t mind hanging out on my own, but the idea of attending something social on my own is just hideous.I’m definitely working on the being brave stuff, I have dreams of taking my little furniture business to a bricks and mortar shop but the idea of actually doing it terrifies me!

    • How horrid does it feel walking into a gathering alone? I just can’t do it! Even though I was with people I knew two mins after I got to the said party, those two minutes felt like 20 minutes.

      I really hope you find the courage to get your business off the ground – imagine how satisfying (and exciting) it’d be! Thanks for popping by x

  6. It can be scary and confronting but I am able to dine alone and really enjoy it. I can even put my phone down now and look around or just reat the paper and eat – woo! I feel you though, it took a while! xxx

    • I hope I get to that point where I get off my phone Rebecca – I think I’ll try again next time I’m hanging out alone! Thanks for stopping by x

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