self

P E R S O N A L: I’m comfortable in my skin, are you?

I read a lot of blogs every week, and one I always tune into is that of “inbetweenie” fashionista Jo at iCurvy. She’s a babe who knows how to style her gorgeous curvy bod, and always looks effortlessly cool. Plus she rocks budget brands and those a little more highbrow and always looks like a million bucks. Basically she’s a blogger goddess. And always looks amazing. But last week Jo went to a wedding, and of course, being the good blogger she is posted a picture of her #ootd on her Instagram. This was the picture. 

And doesn’t she look amazing. The red lip looks divine against the gorgeous navy blue of her gown, and she’s owning that fairy tale hair do. But some of her IG followers thought they’d offer her a little advice on shape wear and why she should be wearing spanx under her frock.

No words on my end. Not one. 

Jo had a few though. You can read them here.

This kind of thing really pisses me off. Firstly, it takes a lot of courage to post pictures online. I’ll say that honestly. I would know, I post a lot. We don’t do it for attention, we don’t do it because we’re vain. It’s not about compensating lack of anything in our lives (yes someone once asked me if that was the reason – it kinda hurt, ouch). We generally want to share something and maybe inspire or encourage a reader or two. I’ve learnt how hard it can be to share since I’ve been posting my every day style snaps over on my Instagram. Some mornings I wake up after 5-6 hours of broken sleep and don’t feel my best. I permanently rock bags under my eyes and some days I can’t be bothered covering them, and take a picture anyway. I do it because I love the community vibe of sharing personal style online. Some days my hair is dirty, but you know what, that doesn’t worry me either. I won’t let it worry me. But some internet trolls waste their time worrying about how other bloggers, Instagrammer’s and people in general look, and feel it is necessary to comment on how people could improve themselves. Not okay! We don’t want or need your two cents worth. Focus that energy on yourself, or on more positive things. Trust me, it is a lot better than bagging out a stranger. How would you feel if someone said something like that to you? Not nice I assume.

Jo didn’t need spanx. She didn’t need anything more to complete her look. She looked amazing. 

Trolls irk me. I wrote about it a few months back (read about it here) when I received my first nasty comment on my own Instagram page. It hurt, and then I realised I was better off without said people seeing my life, and bye bye, they were blocked. I’m very fortunate to say I haven’t had one since. I’m sure I’ll get another one or more soon. YOLO. But I can honestly say I’m at a place where I can brush things off now. I’m comfortable in my own skin. This is me. It’s been almost 28 years and I’m finally at the point where I can say “stuff them”. Anonymous avatars ain’t gonna rain on my parade, and I’m so glad Jo at iCurvy felt the same way. Her blog post was gold. I love her blog even more now for her wit and that #girlboss moment. I love how comfortable she is in her own skin. We all need to find that in ourselves.

Jo’s not the only who’s made me smile lately. Here are a few more body and mind positive and girl power posts to check out by some of my favourite bloggers.

1. Using Selfies For Self Love – Anastasia Amour  

2. From Fight To Fab – Relatable Miss Renton

3. So, You Are Kind Of A Dork. Me Too – Inspiring Wit 

Finally here is one of my own posts you may not have read that I wrote about the fashion industry and how we are in charge of what we wear. It’s about no one but us. More here. So next time you are scrolling through your feed and you see a picture you like, leave them a postive comment. And if you see something you dislike, SCROLL PAST. Do not pass go, do not collect $100. Scroll on by. Remember that it takes a lot to bare your life and soul online, and it’s not fair for you to ruin someone’s day. And on that note I’m off to take ten selfies.

What do you think of trolls? How have you combatted them? 

E x 

Feature image found on Instagram, source unknown.  

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26 Comments

  1. twenty says

    Just love this, well said Em. And yes, fully agree that the girl at ICurvy looks just gorgeous in her beautiful blue dress.
    She is very pretty and what flawless skin. Go her !!

  2. No negativity yet, touch wood . . . I also follow Jo and I think she looked smashing. I remember posting my first few selfies and thinking “who do I think I am?” but I got over it. Now I SLAAAY.

  3. You just can’t seem to get it right when you are putting yourself out there on line. People will tell you that you are fat, that your face makes you look like you look constipated or that you have stumpy legs (yep, I get that one a lot!)… and then they will even bag out girls like sjanalise (or what ever the hell her name is) because she is ‘too skinny’, she is ugly or her thigh gap is gross. So what are we supposed to look like guys? Pretty sure last time I checked, you, myself and all of the other blogging girls were pretty, gorgeous girls with big smiles. I say that is what we are supposed to look like and bah humbug to those who have a more vain perception of what beautiful is

    • Stumpy legs? What the ! Some people have too much time on their hands. We are all beautiful people – no need to bite guys! Thanks for stopping by hun x

  4. I hate to see comments like that, especially when it’s coming from someone who doesn’t actually know the person. For those people, I hooe karma bites them in the ass!

  5. jenni@stylingcurvy says

    I’ve had a few. I always call them on it, give them one opportunity to be nice and if they don’t they’re gone. Of course if the comment is flat out malicious, it’s delete straight away. Not everyone is going to agree with you all the time, nor will they like everything you do…and that’s ok. Just don’t be mean or mean spirited, it’s innecessary and usually says way more about you than you realise (not you Em…the meanies).the more AirPlay you receive the more comments you will get. Set boundaries, teach your community how to play and delete the assholes.

  6. Aww goodness love, you made me tear up. Thank you for always being a positive force. The internets could learn a lot from you xx

  7. So well said Em. I received my first nasty comment on Instagram quite recently from an ex friend who thought that I should consider wearing less make-up. And she even blocked me so I couldn’t even respond to her. I was abit shocked at first but then I figured that I just had to shake if off like u said……..people who do this often are unhappy inside, having to expand this kind of energy to bring someone down. I know she would be unhappy if I said that to her but I’m not that kind of person.
    Love that you are comfortable in your own skin!
    xoxoxo,
    Jo Goh
    http://www.theglamwhisperer.com

    • I’m glad you shook it off girl, your make up is bold and vibrant and gorgeous! And as long as you’re happy it’s no one else’s problem. Xxx

  8. I think Jo looks great in her dress.

    I was always brought up with the fairly common rule “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. It amazes me how few people grasp this concept.

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